hello beautiful!!! it's been on my heart lately to talk about what love really is, what it looks like and why you deserve it, so that's what we're doing today!!
i get my definition of love from scripture (this isn't going to be a religious post though), and it describes love as being patient, selfless and kind, with a lack of envy, boasting, dishonor, and anger. Love means not holding grudges or keeping records of the mistakes people make, and instead, it turns to trust and hope. most of all, love never fails.
though this is the definition given from scripture, i think we can agree that it does a pretty good job of characterizing love, no matter what walk of life or religion you come from.
love is shown when people prioritize these qualities in their relationship with you. the people who love you are kind to you. they are patient through the mistakes you make, and they help you work through them (notice i didn't say that they allow you to walk all over them with each mistake that you make. they should still remember to protect their own hearts). they prioritize you and they want the best for you, without being jealous when you succeed. they're slow to anger with you (hence the whole patience thing), and they rely on the mutual trust they share with you.
this is not to say that we don't all mistakes, because nobody is perfect (huge thank you to hannah montana for the reminder). we all get angry at the people we love. we can get jealous of their successes. we mess up, but at the end of the day, we should still strive to love better the next day (it's like beyonce's "love on top").
the best part of the whole thing is that you (yes, YOU!) deserve this patient and truthful love. you deserve to be loved like this. it doesn't matter what you're struggling with, or how undeserving you believe yourself to be. every single person deserves to be truly loved by someone, be it by a parent, a sibling, a husband, a friend, a girlfriend, anything. love like this is not limited to couples.
what we need to realize is that we deserve this love in it's full form. you deserve the friends who end the phone call with an "i love you," and prove that they do in their actions. you deserve the guy or the girl who says they love you when you're dressed up and who loves you just as much when you're crying on the floor because you had a bad day.
it's easy to know what we deserve, but it can also be really easy to make excuses for the times when we receive love that is less than what is deserved. we overlook it when our friends made us feel left out for the millionth time or when we're left questioning the trust in the relationship we're in.
love is a lot of things, but it's not something that ever should ever leave you questioning yourself. you should never have to feel as if you're unworthy, because the love should be a constant reminder of just how much you are worth. you should never have to question the trust or intentions of the person that loves you.
naturally we all go through insecurities. some days you feel unworthy because of your mistakes. some days you remember the time you were cheated on and it makes you scared about jumping into a new relationship. but none of these insecurities should be caused by the person you love, because they should recognize just how much of a gift you are, which means they know just how important it is to never do anything that could risk losing you.
also, always remember that the best way to find the love you deserve is to give that same love to others. it's the classic golden rule, but man, does it work.
you are a lot of things. you are loved. you are worthy. you are a gift. you are deserving of incredible love, and girl, you better not settle for anything less!! your time is wayyyy too precious to waste it with the people who make you ever question anything about yourself. if you do not feel welcomed and worthy when you're surrounded by the people who "love" you, then that's a sign that you need to start looking for the people who do.
love yourself, love people, and let yourself be loved by people. you deserve it.