hello beautiful!! it's been a minute!! while i'm aware that i don't have thousands of people reading my blog each week, i'm not unaware that i have a decent amount of your lovely selves visiting my site from time to time, and i figured i ought to give you all an explanation for my lack of motivation for my blog/social media/email/happiness project/etc.
let's be real: i haven't been on my a-game with my blogging. i guess i fell into a funk and i didn't know why until about 3 minutes before i started writing this, but i've found that its been a mixture of a lack of motivation and discouragement. i used to love blogging with my whole heart, and i haven't felt that passion in a bit, and i think thats because i started putting too much pressure on myself. i took a class this past year that was focused on developing my blog independently. i learned a lot, but i also started to turn my blog into something that didn't feel as authentic to me. i learned about so many components that people who blog professionally use, and it made me feel like my blog needed to be up to scale with the pros. i hope that one day my blog can be my career, but i had forgotten that it didn't need to be my career yet. i turned a blind eye to my passion for blogging for the pursuit of professionalism.
i started to believe that my lack of motivation meant disinterest, but since i've fallen back into the habit of journalling, i've realized that i really do love the writing component of blogging. i find it therapeutic and so many solutions have been found through pressing a pen to paper. long story short, i discovered that my hiatus from blogging hadn't been caused by a refusal to write, but rather a pressure to make everything feel professional.
it was discouraging, because i'm not really good at all that pro stuff. i don't have a knack for website design or the eye for a beautiful social media feed. it was discouraging to see other people dominating their work when i felt like mine was falling behind (nothing but mad respect and admiration for all those who are out there slaying though).
then i realized.. it doesn't matter. it doesn't. it doesn't really matter what my blog looks like or how well my instagram feed flows together or how many emails i send out a month. what (i hope) matters is the actual content of my blog-- the writing, the reason i began in the first place. i began this journey with my blog in hopes of helping others find encouragement through what i have to say, so, at the end of the day, isn't that the important part?
i feel like i've written a million blog posts about what i'll be doing in the future without a single one being followed through, but this time i mean it. it's my goal to try and put some writing out every day. it won't be perfect. it may not be a lengthy post. it may not even be on a specific topic, but all of that is okay. instead, we're turning this blog into my public journal about the things i love, in hopes that my writing can ignite something in someone else. if i can help just one person, then i've done my job.
so here's what you can look forward to:
- a (most likely) daily post about who knows what, for as long as it takes for me to fall back into love with blogging
- a more genuine version of myself, presented through authentic writing
- some advice, some updates, some thoughts on how good it is to be alive, etc. we're bringing in all sorts of topics
- a lack of structure. the happiness project didn't work for me, and neither did the monthly emails. let's just go for spontaneous surprises from now on
- a lot of lowercase letters. i like lowercase. it's simple and inviting, and that's what i want to feel right now
i'm looking forward to taking a new journey on here. i'm hoping it's one that floods in my love for blogging and i hope that it gives me a new platform to reach people from. daily blogs start tomorrow. so much love for every single one of you. i can't wait to see where this journey takes us. also-- i've been on constant instagram cleanses lately, so the best way to contact me with any questions or blog requests is through my email (email@example.com). i'd love to chat <3